


Too Late For Me

by mggislife2789



Category: Spencer Reid - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cutting, Depression, F/M, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-30
Updated: 2016-09-30
Packaged: 2018-08-18 14:52:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8165776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mggislife2789/pseuds/mggislife2789
Summary: Spencer and the reader are both being bullied mercilessly in high school. She starts to withdraw and Spencer notices. But will it be too late?Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or their original stories. This is only for fun. It's where my brain goes after the credits roll. No copyright intended. Better safe than sorry. ;)





	

You both dreaded going to school. Nothing about your high school experience was normal and nothing about it was magical or amazing like so many people told you it was. Best years of your life, my ass, you thought. If you and Y/N didn’t have each other, you probably would’ve lost your mind long ago. She was the bright spot in your day. You had no idea what this hell would be like without her.

“Hey, Spence,” she muttered, walking up to the school building as if she were walking to her execution. 

You returned the sentiment, having just been beaten to within an inch of your life last week. “Hey, Y/N.”

You were both exceptional students, having begun high school at the age of 9. Now 13 and thankfully in your final year, you had both been stuffed into lockers, beaten, embarrassed in front of nearly the entire school - you name it, you’d both endured it at the hands of your classmates, who were not good people and had no idea how to react to people like you and her.

Your torture was mostly physical, but Y/N’s was more psychological, and sometimes he couldn’t figure out which one was worse. All you knew was that it was taking its toll, you weren’t sure how much longer you could hold out. Your only hope was college. Maybe people were nicer there, but Y/N...you really worried about her. She was made fun of for her glasses on a near constant basis, she didn’t wear makeup, and she dressed in girly clothes even though she wasn’t particularly girly, so the popular girls made fun of her for that. Y/N did’t fit into any particular mold. She was called fat, ugly, disgusting and worthless on an almost daily basis - and lately her demeanor had changed. She was more withdrawn, even from you, and her clothes had changed from pink and purple dresses to black t-shirts and ripped jeans. She was covering up more and you thought you knew why.

Having come from your family, with a mother with schizophrenia and a father that walked out on you, you had developed somewhat of a thick skin, but Y/N came from a together family and hadn’t faced much adversity up until now, so she was only now building up the skin needed to walk through life. You were truly worried about her. If you lost her, you had no idea what you’d do.

As you approached your lockers, Y/N reached toward her own to unlock it, and that’s when you noticed what you’d already assumed - a couple of faint, parallel, jagged lines on her arm. You had to say something to her, at least to let her know you were always there.

“Y/N, you know I have no idea what I would do without you, right?” you questioned, trying to impress upon her how important she was to you, not that it would necessarily do anything, sometimes even if you loved someone it wasn’t enough, but you had to say something. She had no idea how much you loved her.

She looked simultaneous happy and sad, “You’d be better off without me, Spence.” It looked like she really believed that.

“No,” you insisted, “I wouldn’t. Without you, I wouldn’t have anyone who understands me. You know I understand you? That no matter what’s going on you can come to me? You’re my best friend. That’s what I’m here for.”

She subconsciously rubbed at her wrists, seemingly running over the jagged lines she’d left behind. “I know, Spence. You’re my best friend too. You’re too good for me.”

With that, the bell rang, signaling it was time for first period and you walked your separate ways, wishing you could find a better way to express just how much you loved and needed her.

\--------------------

Six weeks later.

Your torture had let up for the time being, mostly just being pushed out of the way and called a nerd or a dork, but Y/N’s had only gotten worse. Two weeks ago, in the cafeteria, she had grabbed a table for you to eat lunch together, and while you were on line grabbing food, the lead girl from the popular group, with her red halter top and tight leather pants had come up behind Y/N and covered her in that day’s lunch. The entire cafeteria turned around to laugh at her and she ran out crying, only stopping when she heard you calling after her.

She’d barely spoken to anyone, including you, since that day, only uttering hellos and goodbyes. The only thing that gave you any hope any more was the fact that when she said hello or goodbye to you, you could detect a faint smile lurking beneath the utter sadness.

You approached your locker alone today. Y/N had called in sick and her parents would be in and out of the house running errands all day. 

Always one to keep your locker neat and tidy, you knew something was off when you saw a piece of paper peaking out from the locker door. You opened it and pulled out a letter addressed to you.

***

Spencer,

I need you to know that none of this is your fault. I just can’t do it anymore. You are literally the only bright spot in my life, but the rest of my life seems to be overtaking it - and I have to find a way to stop the pain. I knew my parents would be out of the house today and although I know they ‘love’ me, I feel like they never notice what’s going on with me, so I’ll be able to do what I need to do without interruption.

Remember, this isn’t your fault. You are the most amazing person I’ve ever met and the only thing that saddens me now is that I won’t be able to see you anymore. But I’m sure you’ll be okay eventually - it’s just too late for me.

Love you,

Y/N

***

Oh god. No. You knew exactly what she was going to do and exactly how she was going to do it. You had to do something. In the distance, you heard a teacher calling out for you, but you’d suffer the consequences later, Detention, suspension, expulsion, whatever. It didn’t matter. You just needed to get to her in time. 

\--------------------

After 10 minutes of sprinting as hard and as fast as you could, you saw her house. Her parents’ cars weren’t in the driveway, which meant that Y/N was alone. He just hoped he wasn’t too late. He banged as hard as he could on the front door, then the side door, and then the back - the sound of your knocking was deafening.

“Y/N!” you screamed, again and again until your voice was hoarse. “Y/N, please answer me!”

She wasn’t responding.

Spotting an open window, you climbed through and ran through every room of the house, screaming her name as you went. As you approached her room, you prepared for the worst, but she wasn’t there. That’s when you saw a faint streak of bloody water under the bathroom door.

“Y/N!” you screamed again, pushing against the door as hard as you could. Finally, it gave way and your worst fear was staring you in the face. Y/N was in the bathtub in her pajamas with a deep gash on each wrist. You were too late.

“Y/N...no...” you cried, dropping to the floor. 

That’s when you heard a sharp intake of breath. She was still alive. You took what clothes were on the floor, as well as your own jacket and tied them around her wrists, trying anything to keep her alive for as long as you could. “Y/N, please stay with me! Please!”

\--------------------

The next few hours went by in a blur. After stopping the bleeding as best you could, you called 911, at the same time begging Y/N to stay with you. When the ambulance arrived, they’d taken you with them, given you were only 13 and there alone. The entire ambulance ride she didn’t wake and you wondered if that intake of breath was a figment of your imagination, or worse...was it real, but you were still too late.

Thankfully, she was still alive and rushed to the emergency room upon arrival. Her parents were notified and rushed in, finding you in a near-catatonic state.

“Spencer,” her mother had cried, “What happened? How did you know?”

Her father sobbed, “Please, son, if you know anything, you have to tell us. Please?”

Without a word, you reached into your pocket, taking out the letter that had inadvertently saved her life. Without it, you wouldn’t have had any idea of her plans and she’d be gone.

\--------------------

About an hour later, Y/N was finally stabilized and her parents had been sent in first. She thought they didn’t notice her, or care, but her parents were devastated, sobbing and hugging her - telling her it was going to be okay and they were going to get her help. They must have told her it was you who’d saved her life, because she caught your eye from outside the room and started crying again. 

That’s when her parents let you go in to see her. “Y/N,” you breathed, “I’m so glad you’re alive.”

She started sobbing again, “Spencer, I’m so sorry! I’m sorry I did this to you. I’m sorry you had to be the one to find me. I just wanted the pain to stop.” She wailed, covering her face with her hands.

“Y/N, I’m sorry you felt like you were all alone,” you started, reaching toward her hand, which was lying limply on the bed. “You’re never going to be alone, and you don’t have to apologize to me. I’ll always be here for you.”

“I love you, Spencer. I literally owe you my life.” She tightened her grip on your hand.

She didn’t owe you anything - you were just glad you’d been given a second chance. “I love you too, Y/N. You have no idea how much.”


End file.
